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Post by Talon Karrde on Dec 22, 2005 12:21:01 GMT -5
From IMdB.com:
"David Letterman's lawyers are urging officials in New Mexico to drop a bizarre restraining order granted to a woman who claims the US chat show host has been using code words to woo her on his late-night program. In a request filed on December 15, Colleen Nestler of Santa Fe, New Mexico, claimed Letterman uses a secret dialogue to express his desire to marry her and train her as a host on his show. She alleges Letterman has forced her into bankruptcy and caused her "sleep deprivation" and "mental anguish." Nestler claims the TV personality also employs gestures and "eye expressions" to convey his desires for her. Legal papers, reveal Nestler began sending Letterman "thoughts of love" in 1993 and that he responded in code words and gestures, asking her to meet him in New York City. She insists the talk show king even asked her to be his wife, saying, "Marry me, Oprah" on one show - she claims Oprah was one of many code names for her. The temporary order, which Nestler is seeking to have made permanent, states Letterman must stay at least three yards away from her and not "think of me, and release me from his mental harassment and hammering." But Letterman's legal team has urged District Judge Daniel Sanchez to overturn the order, claiming it is without merit. The judge has set a January 12 hearing, where he'll consider granting Nestler a permanent order. It is not known why Nestler is seeking the restraining order."
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Post by Talon Karrde on Mar 6, 2006 2:59:02 GMT -5
Speaking of Insane Asylums: MENTAL HOSPITAL PHONE MENU Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital. Please select from the following options menu: If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want. Stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the MotherShip. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway. If you are dyslexic, press 9696969696969696. If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators are too busy to talk with you. If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever. If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up."
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